Want more help with your college essays? The Happiness Spreadsheet is also a battery monitor for enthusiasm. In the meantime, please let us know how we can help you crack the the college admissions code. Click here for my ultimate guide. For example, yesterday in AP Biology, we learned about invasive species and their impact on ecology. Get the latest articles example of college essay test prep tips!
College Essay Sample One
Get into the college of your dreams! We hope these essays inspire you as you write your own personal statement. Just remember to be original and creative as you share your story. My father, an electrical engineer, taught me to explore the world with inquis Most children acquire the same eye color or a similar shaped nose from their parents, but I've inherited much more: a passion for learning and an insatiable curiosity which has served me well throughout my academic example of college essay. My father, an electrical engineer, taught me to explore the world with in Looking back at freshman year, my life was like a cityscape, busy and vibrant.
I proudly reached certain goals that defined the student I wanted to be: made it into the science institute: check, varsity soccer: check, a natio While initially a position as a laborer seemed appealing to a junior in high sc Dreams are shaped by ideals and families shape the beliefs we grasp so strongly. Someday I want to save and change lives example of college essay a medical career. Because my family has taught me that change can be positive and radical in altering lives, I hope to hold that ability someday. I seek the power to impro I am an Internet entrepreneur. Since age 12, I have coded and designed websites -- for my school, example of college essay, the local community, and as a personal hobby and pastime. In fact, I started my own Internet business in and was hired as a webmaster by Intel Corporation this past summer.
I also volunteer my free Mirrors exist to show our outer appearance but nothing beyond that. Only our actions, words, and ideas could possibly example of college essay the personal qualities that matter, example of college essay. The true worth of a person is revealed in those glimpses of light in the midst of adversity and darkness. Those traits that are highly a Each weekend, I teach karate to kids ages As I show the "Little Ninjas" how to position their hands to do a clean shoulder roll, or I help the "Young Tigers" break down a tricky section of the Two-Man Bo Staff form, any frustration or tiredness I might have felt before ente I wended my way through the first through fourth grades mostly without speaking.
So I was surprised when I got a part in the class play, notwithstanding that everybody got a part. I played t When I moved from Long Beach, CA to Philadelphia, PA in the seventh grade, I encountered an environment far different from the one I had become accustomed to. In Long Beach, every day was a struggle for survival. By the age of nine, I had witnessed the death of my mother and one of my best friends g I'm a fifth generation Californian who's picked up a few of the habits of the region, among them surfing and computer programming. What does this mean? Having a foot in both worlds gives me a sense of balance and perspective.
Beyond that, surfing has influenced my software coding and future The Matrix series, for the intriguing philosophical questions and the ground-breaking originality of the action film-making. Success Built to Last, by Jerry Porras, example of college essay, for its great pieces of life wisdom that encourage me to follow my passions in a way that serves the world and me. Last night I was thinking about ink. When rain falls on a handwritten page, the ink spreads out a bit, loses its crispness. But every now and then, example of college essay, hidden colors emerge. Suddenly you discover that simple black ink is green and shades of blue and a fragile pink edge.
If so Last Sunday I realized, example of college essay, again and more fully than ever, why I want to immerse myself in engineering. I awoke in the midmorning, still drifting yet well-rested. In those dreamlike moments before opening my eyes, fragments of thought, old and new, began to coalesce into ideas that I immediately felt a It is my belief that paddling out into the lineup through a bank of heavy mist and suddenly finding yourself unable to see the shore is among the most surreal and inspiring experiences a person can have. As example of college essay wave riders — strangers and friends — wink out of your sphere of sight and In grade 9, I started messing around with Google Sketchup.
It began casually and soon blossomed into an obsession — I would refuse repeated calls for dinner, intent on figuring out the placement of a room or object. I remember trying to virtually remodel our apartment when my brother looked ov After being seated at three large white round tables with folding white chairs, the real Clam Bake began. We attacked the buffet tables, buttered our lobsters, and still had room for dessert, example of college essay. While devou At the corner of each eye lie little crinkle lines, tip-offs to her mood: they might be laughing, or exhausted, or some days furious and fed up with people.
She never hides her anger, her glee, or her fierce, well-deserved While looking through my stacks of pictures, I realize how important the memories in my all-school photos are to me. One particular picture, from ninth grade, is especially significant not because I like to look at what my classmates or teachers l Over the phone, my dad described what was happening as he lifted the cover off of the viewing portal. Suddenly, he began to laugh uncontrollably: the robotic mousetrap I had built out of LEGO Mindstorms had actually caught a rat! On the other end of the line, my 8-year-old self also collapsed in lau I never intended to hire anybody.
In fact, I never sought to obtain employment myself. I was too busy having fun with computers to be bothered with any of that. But as soon as you know how to hit "ctrl-alt-delete," it seems everyone wants tech support, and one thing leads to another. It is like the butterfly effect on an individual, yet grand scale. I step up to the starting line-palms sweating, heart racing. Three short blasts of a whistle followed by one long blast and the trembling commences. After three nerve-wracking seconds, the gun goes off. Dear Jack Daniels, Bacardi, Budweiser, the other suppliers of my mother's closet laundry example of college essay, and Edna Ferber Elementary, Thank you. It is the summer before Kindergarten. Face ashen, she stumbles toward me, the heavy footfalls syncing with my throbbing heart.
I wait as she feebly attempts to p I'm hoping to do an MS in Computer Science at Stanford so that I can become more technical and obtain the skills I need to build the software that I want to exist, rather than just imagine it. I've had several jobs in technology-related fields, as an investment banker example of college essay as an early non-technical e As much as I had hoped our introductions would be made in person, I am just as glad that we will know each example of college essay before we even meet. But first, I have to keep myself in high spirits in order to help others, right?
I tried to hold the canvas as close to me as possible without risking touching it, example of college essay. It was dry, but with oil paints you never really know. Any artist worth her salt knows that. But if you had spent the bett Trupe, World History teacher and former Torrey Pines volleyball coach, was taken aback when he heard I was an athlete. I could knock you down with my breath! I don't have the fram I love listening to hard rock and heavy metal music. I find these music genres liberating because they pump me up and help me release stress. I enjoy doing this so much that I am an expert at games such as Guitar Hero and Rock Band, which I play with friends or alone just for the plea The unique opportunity for me to combine McCormick and Bienen into one dual-degree program is even more attractive, allowing me to receive certification I see the beauty in our natural assembly of neurons, the splendor of circuits in digital chips, and of course the undying symphony of computer code running through a compiler.
As a firm believer of the values of interdisciplinary education, example of college essay, I embrace Benjamin Franklin's drive to create an intellectu With my mocha in hand, I set about exploring the Marriott Copley Square, home of United Synagogue Youth's International Convention Slowly but After World War II, the people of Africa fought to end the effects of European imperialism to achieve political independence and reclaim African culture. After many years of being controlled by Eur Still, her puffy eyes seemed too big for her tiny visage, which seemed curled into an eternal…scowl? Gingerly, I poked one chubby cheek. As my thoughts drifted by with snapshots of scenes of the most memorable parts of my summer, I realized more fully than ever why I love engineering:.
Standing in the dim auditorium at the University of Texas in Austin, I nervously gulped as I nodded at my First Bytes computer science ca Age ten. My dad shows me a family tree, and genealogy piques my interest. I collect data about my own family, interviewing relatives whenever I can, and construct a tree spanning hundreds The air was that of a stagnant summer, stifling hot and stubbornly unmoving.
connections essay example
Moreover, it also identifies your skills to discuss a specific experience. The admission officers will know your personality, character, skills, and talents with your application. They are mostly looking for someone who can engage people with new ideas. Therefore, if you start with a boring topic, it will end up as a bad essay that will risk your grades. Similarly, bad topics will also show that you are boring and lack a good sense of judgment. Thus, avoid too personal, offensive, and off-topic ideas. These will portray that you are unable to process your experiences engagingly. Boring topics do not only cause bad application essays. Sometimes, students cannot structure and put together the essay correctly despite choosing an interesting essay prompt. Therefore, they end up ruining their applications using incorrect writing styles, unclear syntax, and wrong punctuations.
In addition, it gives a bad impression to the admission officers. They consider you either someone who ignores the instructions or someone unable to understand and follow them. Another primary aspect while writing an application is to avoid using overly formal language. Thus, it is better not to use a thesaurus or any other English dictionary. On the other hand, avoid using cliches while choosing a topic and writing the essay. The admission officers want the topic to present you and your uniqueness. Some typical cliches include phrases like:. The admission committees will likely find out the plagiarized content in your essay. Some institutes also run your application by plagiarism checkers. Some students make the mistake of just rephrasing their resume in their college application.
It is a wrong practice. The admission officers are more interested to see your extracurricular activities, accomplishments, and awards. Moreover, you can also mention an achievement that is related to your subject of the essay. Thus, discuss an activity that allows you to express it. Also, use this element to demonstrate your personality impressively. Most students have a hard time checking their content. However, double-checking the essay can help them to avoid grammatical mistakes. After you finish writing, leave your essay for a day or two. With this, you will be able to identify more mistakes while proofreading. You can proofread your application by reading it aloud several times. Similarly, you can also ask someone from your friends and family to proofread it.
Nevertheless, make sure to find someone who shares extensive knowledge of grammar and punctuation. These are the mistakes often made by the writers unintentionally. However, such errors are not considered a very attractive feature in a college applicant. Moreover, they often make the application hard to read. A college essay is indeed an important part of your application. It provides an opportunity for students to show the admission committee what makes them good candidates. However, most people do not possess the right skills and knowledge to craft a perfect essay.
Thus, they end up hiring an essay writer for their college admissions essay. com is the best college application essay service that can help you craft powerful and well-written essays. Our team of writers is highly qualified and experienced to assist you at affordable rates. With us, you will be able to track your work progress. Similarly, we also provide the best college application essays samples along with unlimited revisions and updates. All you have to do is place your order and get the best help for your college applications.
Here are five areas to look for outstanding college essay ideas based on your own life experience:. College Application Essay. College Application Essay Format. College Application Essay Prompts. Statement Of Purpose. Exclusive access to the MyPerfectWords. com Learning Center. You'll get weekly tips and tricks for improving your own writing and for achieving academic success through your writing. We are U. We hold graduate and professional degrees from major universities Princeton, Stanford, UCLA,Georgetown, Dartmouth, Penn, Northwestern. This is all that we do. Address: Office 10, Level 1, Sharjah Media City, Sharjah, United Arab Emirates P.
Box Register Login. Register Login Writers Samples Pricing Order FAQS Why Us Reviews Blog. Paper Due? That's Our Job! Learn More. Top College Application Essay Examples For Students. Why suffer? This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life. Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due.
Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring. Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example breaking into the van in Laredo is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people.
We can help. PrepScholar Admissions is the world's best admissions consulting service. We combine world-class admissions counselors with our data-driven, proprietary admissions strategies. We've overseen thousands of students get into their top choice schools , from state colleges to the Ivy League. We know what kinds of students colleges want to admit. We want to get you admitted to your dream schools. Learn more about PrepScholar Admissions to maximize your chance of getting in. I have always loved riding in cars. After a long day in first grade, I used to fall asleep to the engine purring in my mother's Honda Odyssey, even though it was only a 5-minute drive home.
As I grew, and graduated into the shotgun seat, it became natural and enjoyable to look out the window. Seeing my world passing by through that smudged glass, I would daydream what I could do with it. In elementary school, I already knew my career path: I was going to be Emperor of the World. While I sat in the car and watched the miles pass by, I developed the plan for my empire. I reasoned that, for the world to run smoothly, it would have to look presentable. I would assign people, aptly named Fixer-Uppers, to fix everything that needed fixing.
That old man down the street with chipping paint on his house would have a fresh coat in no time. The boy who accidentally tossed his Frisbee onto the roof of the school would get it back. The big pothole on Elm Street that my mother managed to hit every single day on the way to school would be filled-in. It made perfect sense! All the people that didn't have a job could be Fixer-Uppers. I was like a ten-year-old FDR. Seven years down the road, I still take a second glance at the sidewalk cracks and think of my Fixer-Uppers, but now I'm doing so from the driver's seat. As much as I would enjoy it, I now accept that I won't become Emperor of the World, and that the Fixer-Uppers will have to remain in my car ride imaginings.
Or do they? I always pictured a Fixer-Upper as a smiling man in an orange T-Shirt. Maybe instead, a Fixer-Upper could be a tall girl with a deep love for Yankee Candles. Maybe it could be me. Bridget the Fixer-Upper will be slightly different than the imaginary one who paints houses and fetches Frisbees. I was lucky enough to discover what I am passionate about when I was a freshman in high school. A self-admitted Phys. addict, I volunteered to help out with the Adapted PE class. On my first day, I learned that it was for developmentally-disabled students. To be honest, I was really nervous. I hadn't had too much interaction with special needs students before, and wasn't sure how to handle myself around them.
Long story short, I got hooked. Three years have passed helping out in APE and eventually becoming a teacher in the Applied Behavior Analysis summer program. I love working with the students and watching them progress. When senior year arrived, college meetings began, and my counselor asked me what I wanted to do for a career, I didn't say Emperor of the World. Instead, I told him I wanted to become a board-certified behavior analyst. A BCBA helps develop learning plans for students with autism and other disabilities. Basically, I would get to do what I love for the rest of my life.
He laughed and told me that it was a nice change that a seventeen-year-old knew so specifically what she wanted to do. I smiled, thanked him, and left. But it occurred to me that, while my desired occupation was decided, my true goal in life was still to become a Fixer-Upper. So, maybe I'll be like Sue Storm and her alter-ego, the Invisible Woman. I'll do one thing during the day, then spend my off-hours helping people where I can. Instead of flying like Sue, though, I'll opt for a nice performance automobile.
My childhood self would appreciate that. Bridget takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but her essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of her essay. The essay is arranged chronologically. Bridget starts each paragraph with a clear signpost of where we are in time:. I wanted to become a board-certified behavior analyst. What makes this essay fun to read is that Bridget takes a child's idea of a world made better through quasi-magical helpers and turns it into a metaphor for the author's future aspirations. It helps that the metaphor is a very clear one: people who work with students with disabilities are making the world better one abstract fix at a time, just like imaginary Fixer-Uppers would make the world better one concrete physical fix at a time.
Every childhood Fixer-Upper ever. Ask your parents to explain the back row to you. This essay uses many techniques that make Bridget sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know her. Technique 1: humor. Notice Bridget's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks her younger self's grand ambitions this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other. Technique 2: invented terminology. The second technique is the way Bridget coins her own terms, carrying them through the whole essay. It would be easy enough to simply describe the people she imagined in childhood as helpers or assistants, and to simply say that as a child she wanted to rule the world.
Instead, she invents the capitalized and thus official-sounding titles "Fixer-Upper" and "Emperor of the World," making these childish conceits at once charming and iconic. What's also key is that the titles feed into the central metaphor of the essay, which keeps them from sounding like strange quirks that don't go anywhere. Technique 3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Bridget emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences. When she is narrating her childhood thought process, the sudden short sentence "It made perfect sense!
Similarly, when the essay turns from her childhood imagination to her present-day aspirations, the turn is marked with "Or do they? The first time when the comparison between magical fixer-uppers and the future disability specialist is made is when Bridget turns her metaphor onto herself. The essay emphasizes the importance of the moment through repetition two sentences structured similarly, both starting with the word "maybe" and the use of a very short sentence: "Maybe it could be me. The last key moment that gets the small-sentence treatment is the emotional crux of the essay.
As we watch Bridget go from nervously trying to help disabled students to falling in love with this specialty field, she undercuts the potential sappiness of the moment by relying on changed-up sentence length and slang: "Long story short, I got hooked. The best essays convey emotions just as clearly as this image. Explain the car connection better. The essay begins and ends with Bridget's enjoying a car ride, but this doesn't seem to be related either to the Fixer-Upper idea or to her passion for working with special-needs students.
It would be great to either connect this into the essay more, or to take it out altogether and create more space for something else. Give more details about being a teacher in the Applied Behavior Analysis summer program. It makes perfect sense that Bridget doesn't want to put her students on display. It would take the focus off of her and possibly read as offensive or condescending. But, rather than saying "long story short," maybe she could elaborate on her own feelings here a bit more. What is it about this kind of teaching that she loves? What is she hoping to bring to the lives of her future clients? How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively. Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it.
Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay. When you figure out how all the cogs fit together, you'll be able to build your own whatever this is. All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic did you survive a plane crash? or it can be completely mundane did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble? Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.
Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative. Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due. Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written.
What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it! Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities. Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying. Want to improve your SAT score by points or your ACT score by 4 points?
We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download it for free now:. The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission. Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education. Our new student and parent forum, at ExpertHub. com , allow you to interact with your peers and the PrepScholar staff.
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